Love That Will Not Let Me Go

Here is a hymn that we sing in RUF (Reformed University Fellowship), that always serves to reminds me of the way that Christ cares for us. We can cling to him and in the darkest times the gospel becomes evermore precious to us. The song was written by George Matheson, a Scottish minister whose fiance left him when he was going blind, and his family was gone to celebrate his sister,his companion's, wedding. It is through trial that we find out just how deep and satisfying the Father's love is. The music for this hymn is quite beautiful, I urge you to look it up at Indelible Grace Music .com and listen to it.

O Love That Will Not Let Me Go

1. O Love that will not let me go,
I rest my weary soul in thee;
I give thee back the life I owe,
That in thine ocean depths its flow
May richer, fuller be.

2. O light that followest all my way,
I yield my flickering torch to thee;
My heart restores its borrowed ray,
That in thy sunshine’s blaze its day
May brighter, fairer be.

3. O Joy that seekest me through pain,
I cannot close my heart to thee;
I trace the rainbow through the rain,
And feel the promise is not vain,
That morn shall tearless be.

4. O Cross that liftest up my head,
I dare not ask to fly from thee;
I lay in dust life’s glory dead,
And from the ground there blossoms red
Life that shall endless be.

BARTER, by Sarah Teasdale

Life has loveliness to sell,
All beautiful and splendid things,
Blue waves whitened on a cliff,
Soaring fire that sways and sings,
And children's faces looking up
Holding wonder like a cup.

Life has loveliness to sell,
Music like the curve of gold,
Scent of pine trees in the rain,
Eyes that love you, arms that hold,
And for your spirit's still delight,
Holy thoughts that star the night.

Spend all you have for loveliness,
Spend it and never count the cost;
For one white singing hour of peace
Count many a year of strife well lost,
And for a breath of ectasty
Give all you have been, or could be.

Joy in the Small Things

We have all heard the saying, “stop and smell the roses.” We know that out there somewhere in our busy hectic lives there is beauty and joy. But we can't really stop right now... If you're like me, existence has been defined more by putting one foot in front of the other just to survive. For me, pressures and concerns have been slowly sapping the joy from life as I've plodded from class to class and one late night of assignments to another. But there is a better way. It involves a child-like faith in the Creator that surviving moment by moment is ok. He is taking care of us and wants us to be completely dependent on him. Knowing this provides me with an assurance that I can take a deep breath and press through day to day tasks, not without tiring, but with a strength that comes only from the Lord. It also involves in remembering to take pleasure in one's tasks, in the small things, and in our purpose. For me, this means that as wake up for a 6:00 a.m. tennis practice, I can thank the Lord that I get to play tennis. Really!, I love tennis, what a fun game! Or when I am stuck in a drawing at midnight, needing to finish but the grueling marks just won't come out right, I can remember that I love to draw. Sure there are things I do not like, but seeing those things that make one's moments sparkle help us to survive. Every time I walk past the roses on campus, I turn my head and just look at them for a second as I walk past. They really do cheer me up. One of my favorite things to cosider when all else seems to fail is the sky; I look up and just drink in the wide expanse of blue or beautiful clouds. Remembering that I am here for a reason, also helps to keep me from despair. Even if where we are doesn't make sense the way we want it to, we can know that we have purpose as Bearers of Christ's Light to our world and as saints on the road of sanctification. I pray that the Holy Spirit would fill me with his joy and hope in my life this week.

Bring the Rain

Encouraging music video featuring MercyMe.

I love cooking things that are easy and delicious. Cutting fruit or vegetables up for salad is great and so are fresh salsas! Or soup, mmm.
As we got ready to leave in the morning, we made one of my favorite casseroles to take with us. Chicken Divan! It has broccoli and chicken and cheese and delicious sauce all baked up and served over rice! yum. We also made pimiento cheese for sandwiches. That is so easy-put sharp cheddar, mayonaise, and roasted red bell peppers in the food processer and you're done!
It's great to have time-worn go-to recipes that are fairly easy to make. I am so glad I have learned more than a few from my mom who is a great cook. Thanks Momma! (P.S. complicated dishes are delicious, too)

School Time

I am filled with anticipation, wondering and even doubt as I prepare to head back to college. You see, over the years I have changed my mind back and forth about whether I should go. So I didn't make any grand plans, but when God opened the door for me to be able to go last year, I walked through it. And He has continued to hold it open, providing with each thing, including money, that I need to go.

There aren't many colleges (a small few I am sure) like Belhaven. So small and personal, Christian worldview curriculum, a wonderful Christian art program, smart and caring professors, beautiful campus, and large homeschool percent of the student body. Belhaven is far from perfect but a chance to play tennis and learn the art skills from a rare gifted art instructor has been a treat.

So I am going back with no intention of quitting. I miss my family and even wonder if I should leave home. But my parents do want me to go if I can. College is not for everyone and girls especially should think twice before following the trend. In my case I am learning things that I could not have learned at home and the life experience has been valuable. I will continue to pray and follow God's leading one step at a time.

I think that God has a different path for each of us, but reading the Bible is the clearest way to understanding God's plan for us. The Bible doesn't say girls may not go to college. It does say what is expected from a Christ-honoring woman. A helpmeet to her husband, mother to her children, minister to the needy, teaching God's Word to younger women. This is not a career woman who pursues her own goals above others, although she may have a source of income. I hope that my college experiences, and especially my art classes, will make me a better woman and most importantly better able to fulfill the role Christ has for me to play down the road.

Here is a video of Rep. Forbes reminding us of America's true heritage and how it is no longer following it.




So true.

Do you notice the new background? I have learned how to put my own painting up as the background and am very excited about this. like it?

Doing Something

A week or so ago, I typed the word “generation Y” into my search box. I am designing a logo and I thought learning a little more about the characteristics of my generation might give me some more ideas. I found some interesting articles. Apparently this generation is interested in doing something. Business are advised to make their young employees feel as though they are making a positive difference. A USA Today poll from 2003 showed that 61% of teens and young people feel personally responsible for making a difference in the world.
Interesting. Do book titles Do the Right Thing, Do Something, Do Hard Things sound familiar?
It is a trending movement in our society right now. And it's not just teens. We live in a world of unlimited comunication and technology like never before, and we feel empowered. But at the same time our world is crumbling: wars, violence, drugs, disease, political disaster. We want to do something. We know we can. But what?
What can we do? We should not limit ourselves or our abilities. Here are some of my ideas:

Make a difference in your own home:

Be faithful in the small things such as doing chores around the house and
being a compassionate, helpful influence. Open your eyes. Ask. Be a benefit and
not a burden to your family. Be a godly example as much as you can.

Let your voice be heard.

Most of us have facebook pages or blogs, these are places where we can speak
out for truth! Instead of chatting about movies, encourage one another and let the
world know what you think about infanticide, socialism, and terrorists. Or the
movie industry! Speak your mind, but do it gently.

Volunteer

Be hands on. Volunteer to teach Sunday school, mentor, become a doctor or
nurse, DO what you see is needed.

Action.

Civil disobedience, holding signs, signing petions, write books, advertise,
campaign, make phone calls, there is no end to this list.

Pray!! This is the most powerful weapon of all. Praying and reading God's Word will enable you to fight battles that you never could have imagined.

And don't give up!

What can you do? Take it one step at a time. You may be surprised how far you can get.

MY BLOG

Hi everyone!
I am so sorry that I have been absent for so long, but I am going to schedule myself to make sure that stay on top of blogging more often!
I have just spent a lovely week visiting my grandmother in Virginia. We visited art musems and visited with family. (I am originally from that area so I have a lot of family there). I am feeling encouraged to get back to my art with a new vigor.
I thought some of you might be interested in why I named my blog “A Flower of the Field.” Psalm 103:15 reads, “As for man, his days are like grass, he flourishes like a flower of the field; the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more. But from everlasting to everlasting the Lord's love is with those who fear him,and his righteousness with their children's children-with those who keep his covenants and remember to obey his precepts.” You see, I find this verse comforting. God is unchanging and steady, he is always loving and just. No matter what we do, he never loses his temper, never goes back on his word. We are temporary and weak, but guess what? God is taking care of his children! There is another verse: “Observe how the lilies of the field grow, they do not toil, nor do they spin, yet I say to you, not even Solomon in all his glory did not clothe himself like one of these,” Matt. 6:28. So we should not be anxious for tommorrow for only God knows what it will bring. Sometimes we flowers are bending in the storm, other times we are lifting our faces to the sun. But through it and beyond it even when are gone from the earth the Lord is remembering us! And if our trust is in him we will live forever with him. Casting Crowns sings a wonderful song about it:


Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth,
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt.
Who am I?
That the bright and morning star,
Would choose to light the way,
For my ever wandering heart.


Bridge:Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

Chorus:I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again.
Who am I?
That the voice that calmed the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.
I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.
I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.I am yours.
I am yours.
Whom shall I fear?
Whom shall I fear?
I am yours..I am yours..

I have this song playing on my playlist(lower right on this page), stop and listen and see if you can't give your troubles to the Lord, not once, but over and over again, for He is always there.



Besides, I love flowers!

A Deeper Reality

As Christians we know that there is more to life than material things. There are realities that we cannot physically comprehend. When we think "abstract" we think of words like "God, souls, love, truth, fear." These are as solid realities as the material ones. But there other things which are real. Relationships between things, between people, between material and immaterial, and between immaterial things are actualities themselves. In fact, every thing and concept is affected by every other one. When we know someone really well we know them for more than what they look like, more than what they do, we know as them. I am not endorsing the neo-platonic view of separation of material and immaterial (that earthly things are bad). An illustration of this how we react to color. A room painted red will give a different effect than one in blue. Or try line. A solid straight line seems to say something different a loose curvy one. It is different but is it the same difference to everyone? As an artist I am interested in understanding this deeper reality. When I first started to draw, my goal was lifelikeness. I did not achieve this in any way. Then I realized that it is not what you know but what you see. The eyes see things differently than they are. (A bird may look like a flash of white). But this past year I have connected a few more dots. Art is about creating an image. It translates something that previously existed into something that can be viewed and shared. It brings something from the immaterial world into the tangible. Often, and this is my goal, it communicates about something that we know or understand in a more powerful way(than simply looking). As my professor says, "Artists are no different(capability-wise) than anyone else-they are just much more sensitive to what they are perceiving." Abstract and non-objective art is often a result of this search for understanding the reality of something. (though not necessarily). It is not just what things look like that contributes to its essence. In Christian Perspective class, the professor said,"What is the ultimate reality? God." I asked" How can something more or less real? That is an absolute." He said that is not what he meant. Everything is caused by something else. We call God the Prime Mover and ultimate Truth. Everything is not God, but He is the Creator sustainer. So as Christian artists when we are searching for that something more, we are learning about God and his creation. It is a lifelong journey, one that I am eager for and that I am excited to be on.

Midnight Music Musings

The church service at Holy Trinity Anglican church this morning was worshipful as usual, but one thing caught me and hasn't let me go all day. A man and his wife who were visiting played the offertory song him with the guitar and mic and she with the violin. He played "Be Thou My Vision". He did not know that that was one of the planned communion hymns as well. It fit in perfectly with the service and lesson of the day. So we got to first listen to and then sing this beautiful Irish hymn. It was so sung so well during the offertory that it was extremely powerful. I personally can't get enough of this song and similar Celtic hymns. When I got back to my dorm room i listened to several versions online, I am still not tired of hearing this song. Something about it hurts inside and pulls. I think it is the combination of the lyrics with the music. It reminds of C.S. Lewis when he wrote of the eternal longing inside man's heart for something deeper and beyond, that pulls toward eternity and ultimately God. It is this longing that people try to satisfy in so many ways but are only left feeling more empty. Only Jesus is big enough to fill this void. I had an interesting conversation with a friend this evening. We we talking about genetics and how there seems to be a cultural and family inheritance that goes beyond physical features. She is half Scottish and mentioned how Celtic music is something special to her and that she loved it before she knew what it was when she came across it. My mother also has love for this very same hymn, so I wonder if my affection for it is partly genetic. Whether it is or not, this I know: I want the Lord to be my inheritance, now and always! I praise the Lord for songs like this and "You Raise Me Up " and "In Christ Alone" that are especially moving to us Irish hymn lovers. Praise God for music to praise Him with. And praise him for putting eternity in our hearts and filling up our parched and hungry souls with his living water!

Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.Thou my best Thought, by day or by night,Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.

Be Thou my Wisdom, and Thou my true Word;I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord;Thou my great Father, I Thy true son;Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.

Be Thou my battle Shield, Sword for the fight;Be Thou my Dignity, Thou my Delight;Thou my soul’s Shelter, Thou my high Tower:Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.

Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise,Thou mine Inheritance, now and always:Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,High King of Heaven, my Treasure Thou art.

High King of Heaven, my victory won,May I reach Heaven’s joys, O bright Heaven’s Sun!Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,Still be my Vision, O Ruler of all.

I am beginning to be excited for the summer! In less than two weeks I will be home. My mind is frequently occupied with plans for the summer. I want to do so many things. I will be working on different art ideas and projects and drawing in my sketchbook. I will get to spend time with my family and help out around the house- can you imagine actually missing chores? well, i still prefer washing the car to the dishes, but i will be glad to do normal home things. I may get a part time job, i will get my drivers license, and play lots of tennis and run. The list is long and probably won't be completed but the feeling of potential is always exciting. Thinking of plans reminds me of the future; every child is used to the question: what do you want to be when you grow up? No one really knows what the future holds, but I do have dreams for my future. I know that I want to graduate from Belhaven with my fine art degree and hopefully connections and art shows that will sustain my ability to make successful art-hopfully illustrating childrens books as well as some painting and drawing. But this really isn't my most important goal. I want to get married, have a family, and create a home for them. This is an enjoyable thought to daydream about, but I know that it is not easy. My dream is that my home would be a place people would come to, somewhere my parents or siblings or friends could stay if they wished. I have always admired my mother's gift of hospitality and desired to make that a ministry of my own as well. I have another dream: I want to be a tennis coach for a high school team. I also want to be a part of children's ministry. I enjoy being in charge and I love kids so running a vacation bible school or teaching sunday school appeals to me as way to serve in the church. And last, but probably most importantly, I want to help end abortion in our generation. I feel that the Lord has laid each of these things on my heart, but I do not how or when they will happen. Or if I can do all of them. But God does. If i walk in his ways then He will show what I am to be doing. Proverbs 19:21 says: Many are the plans in a man's heart but the counsel of the Lord, it will stand.

We must be ready to surrender all of our plans and hopes and dreams to the Lord. After all we are His and His plans are infinitely so much greater than ours even when we do not understand why things often do not work out the way we wish. But I still dream and aspiring to service in the kingdom is a good thing. And we do not have to wait till we are older, we can accomplish things now.

Please pray for me in this upcoming week as I face finals and late nights drawing on my final projects. May the Lord give us His peace.

Running

I went running this afternoon and was a little surprised at how thoroughly I enjoyed it. I ran over 2 miles and loved it. It was a good time to start thinking. I realized that one can enjoy running even when it starts to hurt. I used to think that I didn't really like running- it was uncomfortable and even made me feel sick. So? I begin to see that running means running through the pain. And it does get better, but then we can just go farther till it hurts. It is a struggle, but one we were meant for. This is what apostle Paul meant when he compared the Christian life to running. It is not easy, no, it is hard. But the Lord created us to live for him, to run this race. Not everyone is able to run physically, but we are all running towards the heavenly prize. Lift your eyes to the horizon, can you see your goal? It is there, Jesus waiting with his arms open. Heaven is our ultimate prize, but there are others along the way. When we think we have learned one lesson, conquered a fear, or have helped someone, another obstacle crosses our path. It is called sanctification. It will never end until we are made perfect on the other side. But running is pleasant; the joy can override the pain. The Holy Spirit is our wind. The end is closer than you know. Keep going! I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. -Philipians 3:14

God often uses hard times to grow us. We do not learn to trust in him quite so much when we think we've got it all together. I have realized that when I am hard pressed, I do come through and am the better for it. Jesus becomes so much more precious when we realize that he is our all. At the beginning of this semester the art program was getting ready to have its student show. I was determined that I should get in. But, hard as i worked, I continually found myself returning to the drawing board. There were only a few days until the deadline. One evening, I was told by the art professor that it was ok if I didn't make it, he doubted I would, but I had learned a lot. Emotionaly worn out, I felt like giving up. Then my roommate(dear Anna)turned on her music: it was Selah's "You Raise Me Up". I bent my head and cried. In this moment of being broken I realized that it did not matter if I made the show. But it did matter that I trust the Lord. Several long days (and nights) later, I had the pleasure of being told my drawing would hang on the gallery wall. Sure, I was glad that I was in, but it was not so important to me anymore. I had learned that Jesus was helping me, with his help I could become an artist. But he had to come first. Now I find myself in yet another hard place, with finals closing in, art project deadlines looming, a long weekend of conference tennis ahead, and important decisions to make. My mother is sick with a chronic disease, I miss my family, and dear friends will be moving on(from school). At times I want to scream. I can't do it. That is true. But with God's help I will pull through. He is teaching me every time I fail on the court or with my drawing pencil. He is molding me into the young woman that he wants me to be. So I should rejoice in this time of struggle. Like my drawing depicts, a rose takes time to open, to develop, and mature. Praise the Lord.

Not that we are adequate in ourselves to consider anything as coming from ourselves, but our adequacy is from God. 2 Cor. 3:5

This is my first time having a blog, but I have decided that it would be a good way to share my thoughts about things and keep friends up to date on what I am up to.

Today is the first day of our Spring break here at Belhaven College. Yay! I can breath again. I am going to ride back home with my dad and then carpool back to school next week. I am looking forward to a week of less studying, and more drawing. I have design projects to complete, but I will enjoy doing those at home. I am glad to be able to spend time with my family, especially my 3 yr. old brother. It would be rather lonely to stay on campus, but as several people are doing it -i hope they find plenty to do!

It has been such a pretty spring. Today is so rainy and cold, it reminds me just how special those "perfect" days are. I love looking for those little signs of God's love. Something as ordinary as a blue sky reminds me who is in control and gives me the perspective I need to encourage me when I am down.

I look forward to sharing with you over the coming days and weeks!