~The Song in my Head Today~

Thy mercy my God is the theme of my song,

The joy of my heart, and the boast of my tongue.

Thy free grace alone, from the first to the last,

Hath won my affection and bound my soul fast.

Without Thy sweet mercy, I could not live here.
Sin would reduce me to utter despair,
But through Thy free goodness, my spirit's revived
And He that first made me still keeps me alive.

Thy mercy is more than a match for my heart,
Which wonders to feel its own hardness depart.
Dissolved by Thy goodness, I fall to the ground
And weep for the praise of the mercy I've found.

(Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah)

Hallelujah

(Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah)

Great Father of mercies, Thy goodness I own

In the covenant love of Thy crucified Son.

All praise to the Spirit, Whose whisper divine

Seals mercy and pardon and righteousness mine.

All praise to the Spirit, Whose whisper divine

Seals mercy and pardon and righteousness mine.

Well, Hallelujah

~Caedmon's Call (you should buy the album!)

Like a Little Child

Earlier today, I was frustrated. Stop it, I told myself. Don't be so childish. Then this song that we sang at RUF last Tuesday started to run through my head. It reminds us to become childlike and not childish. I have had to study the book of Mark for New Testament class and once again I was a shown that when we are in submission to God, we are best in a position for Him to use us. Jesus loved children, they are not pretentious, they come just as they are. I pray the Lord will take me back there, where I can rest in His control the way a child knows her father will take care of her and does not worry. I want to go so far as to lose my life, not count my own work as value, so that I may find it, in Christ be truly who He wants me to become. Becoming humble hurts sometimes, but it is worth it to sit my heavenly fathers lap!

1. Jesus cast a look on me,

Give me sweet simplicity
Make me poor and keep me low,
Seeking only Thee to know

2. All that feeds my busy pride,
Cast it evermore aside
Bid my will to Thine submit,
Lay me humbly at Thy feet

3. Make me like a little child,
Of my strength and wisdom spoiled
Seeing only in Thy light,
Walking only in Thy might

4. Leaning on Thy loving breast,
Where a weary soul can rest
Feeling well the peace of God,
Flowing from His precious blood

5. In this posture let me live,
And hosannas daily give
In this temper let me die,
And hosannas ever cry!

From the Inside Out

It was a long day, but a good day. :) It started at 6:30 in the gym and continued with drawing class at 8. After an interesting morning in the art building (including learning about printmaking, how cool is that?),  the whole school headed to chapel. We were reminded of the simple powerful story of Jesus's life and work on the cross by a dramatic speaker. We also found out that Belhaven RUF is bringing Tim Keller to town! Looking forward to that! Next was tennis practice and I learned 3 things before heading back to the art building for an afternoon in sculpture class. 1) I can still hit (always afraid i'll forget) 2) My game needs a ton of work 3) I will always love tennis. and my team :) When I left the art building after spending a long time in my studio literally swimming in charcoal, I jumped in the car with friends to go to a little frozen yogurt shop that was having a sale. That was fun :D Then I donned my fedora and raincoat and set out again, this time to attend a friends junior voice recital. It was beautiful and all her hardwork definitely pays off. By the time we got back, it was time for the highlight of my week: RUF!!! yeah. It was that heaven meets earth kind of fellowship, worship, and teaching. We sang a song that had I had listened to on my internet radio a couple of times earlier during the week. It talks about that living in grace where when we fail or the world seems dark, there is one light that still pierces through. And I want that Person to change my heart and change my attitude to want to love Him. To want to love others. To want to live in grace and humility. The Lord must be in complete control of our lives. When I reflect on my day, it positives and all its failures I remember that each day is a part of God's work on me. Its the personal side of a big God who is in control of everything. And by His miracle He is changing our sinful hearts into hearts that seek him and understand that its not about us.

My heart and my soul, I give You control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise, become my embrace
To love You from the inside out

I Wanna Be With You

One day at a time. That's what I keep reminding myself everytime I add something else to my planner. It seems as though every hour of my semester is already zoned out-even double booked at times. Can I really do all of these things? How do I not feel panicky everytime I think about the calendar? Well, it won't be easy. But I shall rest-rest in the knowledge that the Lord is in control and that all I HAVE to DO is ABIDE in Him. If that is the only requirement, then its not my job to worry. It is not a superficial denial, but an acceptance of my weakness and His strength. The Lord is walking with us through the story that He is writing.

I was laughing pretty hard with few good friends tonight. One friend was teaching us how to say some things in her language. It was a special moment, in fact, the whole evening was sweet to me because of the people that I was with, even as we stressed (or tried not to stress;) ) over our schedules. It is at moments like those, that I sense that it is the relationships and lived out life that matters more than accomplishments. As we press forward and work hard, praying that the Lord use us, He will. He will use our lives in ways we never could have imagined, yet it is none of our own doing. He is teaching me that since I am His, I can serve, I can work, I can even fail. He wants us to rely on Him fully, to lean on Him, because He wants to be in a relationship with us.

What would it take to be the person I see?
What can I do to glorify Thee?

My power is sufficiency.
Your weakness glorifies me greatly.

“My power is perfected in weakness,

My grace is sufficient for you.” ~ 2 Corinthians 12:9

God is GOD!

I just want to say, it doesn't matter what we think or we plan, Gods ways are so much infinitely better! God is truly in control. Can't we accept this and submit?
I am so glad that I do not run my life but that my perfect heavenly Father does. He is simply amazing! God, please enable me to trust in you and never forget your lovingkindness.

My Prayer Tonight

I want my life on earth and my future in heaven to merge.
Within my soul a quiet confidence,
I want to live a life worth living, by living a life of giving,
Within my body steadfastness.
To quell my fear, by putting all my confidence in my Saviour,
Within my mind, true hope.
I want to learn meekness, and become shameless,
to Love my Lord.

Make War!

I hear so many Christians murmuring about their imperfections and their failures and thieir addictions and shortcomings and I see so little war. "Murur, murmur, murmur, why am I this way? MAKE WAR!...If you wonder how to make war go to the manual. Dont just bellyache about your failures. Make war! ~ quote from John Piper